How to Get Recruiters
    to Fight Over You

    The insider playbook to getting headhunted

    By James Bugden, Senior Recruiter @ Uber

    ·
    25 min read

    Sign in to save your progress and access all guides

    This guide gives you the insider playbook, written by a recruiter and headhunter who sits on the other side of the table every day. You'll learn how recruiters and headhunters think, what makes them pick up the phone for one candidate and ignore another, and how to build relationships that open doors for the rest of your career.

    Why work with recruiters and headhunters at all? Because many roles never get posted publicly. Because they have direct relationships with hiring managers. Because when they submit you, you skip the pile and go to the front of the line.

    Before you read this guide

    Your resume is the first thing a recruiter or headhunter sees. If yours isn't ready, start with the Perfect Resume: 10 Golden Rules guide before reading this one.

    01

    Recruiters vs Headhunters: Know the Difference

    This distinction matters. Throughout this guide, these two terms mean different things.

    Recruiters (Internal)

    Employees of the company they hire for. They fill roles for their employer only. They know the culture deeply and have direct access to the hiring manager. At large companies, internal recruiting teams include sourcers who find candidates, recruiters who manage the process, and coordinators who handle logistics. Sourcers use LinkedIn Recruiter (a paid tool) to search for candidates by keywords, skills, location, and job title. Your LinkedIn profile is their search engine.

    Headhunters (External)

    Independent. They work with multiple client companies. How they get paid depends on the type — retained, contingency, staffing, or outplacement.

    Which to target based on your level

    • • Early career / common skills → internal recruiters, staffing agencies
    • • Mid-career / specialized → contingency headhunters
    • • Senior / executive → retained search firms + contingency headhunters
    • • Career changers → staffing agencies (for bridge roles) + contingency headhunters in your target industry

    Not All Headhunters Are Good

    Headhunter quality varies widely. The field attracts people from all kinds of backgrounds, and not everyone has deep industry expertise. Your job is to figure out which headhunter is worth your time before you hand over your resume and career details.

    Red Flags

    • • Won't tell you where they're sending your resume
    • • Blast your resume to companies without permission
    • • Pressure you to accept mismatched roles
    • • Can't answer basic questions about the company/role
    • • Disappear after the initial call
    • • No presence or credibility on LinkedIn

    Green Flags

    • • Ask detailed questions about your goals and deal-breakers
    • • Prep you before interviews with insider knowledge
    • • Give honest feedback, even when it's not what you want
    • • Communicate regularly and return calls/emails
    • • Have a track record in your industry
    • • Protect your confidentiality
    02

    How the Business Works

    The Business Model (Headhunters)

    You are the product. The company is the customer. The headhunter is the broker.

    YOU

    (Product)

    You pay nothing.
    You get coached.
    You get placed.

    HEADHUNTER

    (Broker)

    Screens you.
    Preps you.
    Advocates for you.

    COMPANY

    (Customer)

    Pays the fee.
    Sets requirements.
    Makes hire decision.

    The headhunter works FOR the company — but is financially motivated to get YOU hired.

    Once a headhunter picks you as their candidate, they are financially motivated to get you hired. They will coach you, prep you, and push the company for a decision. But they need you to be a candidate worth betting on.

    The Business Model (Internal Recruiters)

    Internal recruiters are salaried employees of the company. They don't earn a fee per placement. They have hiring targets to hit. Their incentive is to fill roles with qualified candidates who will stay and perform well. They are on your side during the process, but their priority is the company, not you.

    The Hiring Pipeline

    At large, well-known companies, the pipeline typically looks like this:

    200+ applications
    30-50 resume screens
    10-15 recruiter screens
    5-8 technical screens
    2-3 final interviews
    1 offer

    ← Steepest drop: resume screen →

    1. Your application enters the Applicant Tracking System (ATS) queue. Not all applications get reviewed.
    2. Resume screen. A recruiter or inbound sourcer spends 5-20 seconds scanning your resume. This is where the steepest drop-off happens.
    3. Recruiter screen. A phone call to confirm experience, motivation, and soft skills.
    4. Technical or competency screen. A deeper evaluation of your skills.
    5. Final interviews. Multiple rounds with hiring managers, team members, and senior leaders.
    6. Offer. A pipeline starting with 100+ qualified resumes commonly produces a single offer.

    How Your Resume Gets Prioritized

    1

    Referrals

    Almost always read in depth.

    2

    Headhunter submissions

    Similar boost as a referral.

    3

    Local candidates

    No relocation, no paperwork.

    4

    No visa needed

    Faster to start.

    5

    Visa + relocation

    Most expensive. Last priority.

    This is why building headhunter relationships matters. When a headhunter submits you, you move up the priority list.

    03

    The Headhunter's Process: Step by Step

    1

    Brief

    Company sets specs

    2

    Search

    Database + network

    3

    Contact

    Email or LinkedIn

    4

    Screen

    2-3 calls, different days

    5

    References

    Reference checks

    6

    Present

    Top 3-5 to hiring manager

    7

    Interview

    Headhunter = your coach

    8

    Result

    Hire or pass

    1. Company gives the headhunter a job to fill (with specific requirements)
    2. Headhunter searches their database and network for matches
    3. Headhunter contacts potential candidates (usually by email or LinkedIn)
    4. Headhunter screens candidates with 2-3 phone calls on separate days (to check for consistency)
    5. Headhunter checks references
    6. Headhunter presents the top candidates to the hiring manager (by this point, the headhunter knows you inside and out)
    7. Company interviews the candidate (headhunter becomes your interview coach and advocate)
    8. Company hires or passes. If hired, headhunter bills the company. If passed, headhunter keeps you in the database for next time.

    Where most candidates fail

    The screening call at step 4 is where most candidates lose. For a full breakdown of how to pass it, check out the Screening Playbook guide.

    If you've been professional and easy to work with, the headhunter will remember you every time a matching role comes in. The long game matters more than any single placement.

    04

    Are You a Bluefin Tuna or a Catfish?

    A framework for understanding how headhunters value you:

    Bluefin Tuna

    • • Rare skills
    • • Hard to find
    • • Headhunters chase you
    • • Specialized + in demand
    • • Companies pay headhunters to find you

    Catfish

    • • Common skills
    • • Easy to find
    • • Companies find you on their own
    • • Generalist. Replaceable.
    • • Companies don't need to pay to find you

    The honest truth: if your skills are common and your experience is generic, headhunters will deprioritize you. Not because you're bad. Because companies don't need to pay a placement fee to find you.

    What Makes Someone a "Tuna"

    • • Specialized skills in demand but short supply in your field
    • • Domain expertise (deep knowledge of a specific industry combined with your function)
    • • Leadership experience at recognized companies
    • • Rare combinations (e.g., engineering + management, finance + operations)

    How to Move from Catfish to Tuna

    • • Build specialized experience in a niche area of your field
    • • Get into recognized companies, even in smaller roles, to build your brand
    • • Develop T-shaped skills: deep in one area, broad enough to connect across functions
    • • Build a track record of measurable results you can point to
    05

    How Your Experience Level Changes Everything

    Director / VP / Executive

    Retained search firms + contingency

    Tuna. They come to you.

    Senior (8+ yrs)

    Retained + contingency headhunters

    Likely tuna.

    Mid-career (5-8)

    Contingency headhunters

    Transition zone.

    Early-mid (3-5)

    Contingency headhunters (start connecting)

    Building relationships.

    Early career (0-2)

    Internal recruiters + staffing agencies

    Catfish. Build skills.

    Career changers

    Staffing agencies + contingency in target industry

    Depends on transferables.

    06

    The 7 Rules That Make Recruiters Want to Work with You

    Rule 1: Understand Who Pays Them

    Headhunters get paid by the company, not by you. Internal recruiters are employed by the company. In both cases, the company is the client.

    Don't waste their time on roles you won't take. Don't let them submit you to get a counter-offer from your current employer. Don't say yes to relocation when you won't move. Do any of these and the relationship is over.

    Rule 2: Keep Their Secrets

    When a headhunter tells you about a role, don't share the details with other headhunters or candidates. Don't apply to the company directly after learning about the role through a headhunter. Their information is their livelihood.

    This protects you too: if you're currently employed, a good headhunter protects your confidentiality. A bad one blasts your resume everywhere.

    Rule 3: Be Honest About Everything

    Don't lie on your resume. Don't embellish. Don't hide a firing, a gap, or a problem. Headhunters and recruiters will find out. They check references you didn't give them. They talk to other headhunters. If they find out you lied after submitting you to a client, your name is burned.

    If you have a problem in your past, tell the headhunter upfront. They have placed candidates with firings, gaps, and career issues. They know how to position it. But they need to know first.

    If you've already applied to a company directly, tell the headhunter before they submit you. A headhunter cannot place you at a company that already has your resume on file.

    Script: Disclosing a Firing

    "I want to be upfront with you. I was let go from [Company] in [month/year]. [One sentence on what happened. Keep it factual, no blame.] It was a tough experience, but here's what I took from it: [one sentence on what you learned or changed]. I wanted you to hear it from me first so there are no surprises."

    Script: Disclosing a Career Gap

    "You'll see a gap on my resume from [date] to [date]. [One sentence explanation: family leave, health, caregiving, personal project, layoff recovery, etc.] During that time I [anything productive you did: freelanced, took courses, volunteered, etc. If nothing, that's fine too.] I'm ready to get back in and here's why I'm excited about [target role/industry]."

    Script: Disclosing a Career Issue (Legal, Conduct, etc.)

    "Before we go further, I want to share something. [State the issue in one sentence. Be direct.] Here's the context: [2-3 sentences max. Facts, no excuses.] I've [what you've done to address or resolve it]. I'd rather you know now so we can work with it than have it come up later."

    Rule 4: Be Consistent, No Surprises (Headhunters)

    Tell them upfront: your salary requirements, your location preferences, your deal-breakers, your timeline. Don't change your story at the offer stage. Don't spring new demands at the last minute.

    Why this matters more with headhunters: a headhunter has invested their own time and reputation presenting you to a client. If you change your requirements at the last minute, the headhunter loses credibility with their client. That damages their business. They won't work with you again.

    With internal recruiters, the process is more flexible. But even with internal recruiters, don't blindside them with demands they've never heard before.

    Rule 5: Respond Fast

    Call headhunters and recruiters back the same day. Timing matters. Jobs move fast. Candidates have gotten hired because they were available for an interview with 6 hours' notice. Candidates have lost jobs because they took 3 days to respond.

    Even if your answer is no, respond. Ghosting a headhunter guarantees they won't call you next time. If the hiring manager contacts you directly during the process, tell your headhunter.

    Rule 6: Listen to Your Headhunter's Coaching

    When a headhunter asks you to change your resume, do it. They know what the hiring manager looks for. When they send you interview prep materials, read them.

    When they ask you to be flexible with scheduling, be flexible. Playing hard to get doesn't increase your value. It makes the company pick the next candidate.

    Rule 7: Communicate Everything, Especially Other Interviews

    If you're interviewing with other companies, tell your headhunter. Don't name the company (Rule 2 applies), but tell them you're in process elsewhere.

    The headhunter needs to know the full picture to negotiate the best deal for you. If another offer is on the table, the headhunter will push their client to move faster.

    Script: Telling a Headhunter You're Interviewing Elsewhere

    "I want to keep you in the loop. I'm also in the interview process with another company. I'm not able to share which one, but I wanted to be transparent. I'm [at X stage: phone screen / final round / waiting on an offer]. This role with your client is [still my top choice / equally interesting / something I want to explore further]. I wanted you to know so we can plan timing on your end."
    07

    How to Find and Approach Recruiters and Headhunters

    Where to Find Them

    • • LinkedIn (the primary channel)
    • • Industry events, conferences, and trade shows
    • • Referrals from colleagues who were placed by a headhunter
    • • Google search: [your industry] + [your function] + "recruiter" or "search firm"

    How to Approach

    • • Email first, never cold call
    • • If you have a referral, mention the name
    • • Attach a strong resume
    • • Keep the email short: who you are, what you do, what you're looking for
    • • Submit to their website/ATS if they have one

    Cold Outreach Email to a Headhunter

    Subject: [Your Title] | [Your Industry] | Open to Opportunities Hi [Headhunter Name], I'm a [your title] with [X years] of experience in [your industry/function]. I'm exploring new opportunities and wanted to connect. My background is in [2-3 key skills or areas of expertise]. I'm targeting [type of role] at [type of company or specific companies if relevant]. I've attached my resume. I'd welcome a brief call if you have roles that could be a fit, or to introduce myself for future opportunities. Best, [Your Name] [Phone] [LinkedIn URL]

    Outreach Email with a Referral

    Subject: Referred by [Referral Name] | [Your Title] in [Industry] Hi [Headhunter Name], [Referral Name] recommended I reach out to you. They mentioned you specialize in [industry/function] and thought we should connect. I'm a [your title] with [X years] of experience in [your area]. I'm currently exploring new opportunities in [target role type]. I've attached my resume. I'd appreciate a brief conversation if you have roles that could be a fit. Best, [Your Name] [Phone] [LinkedIn URL]

    LinkedIn Connection Request to a Headhunter

    Hi [Name], I'm a [your title] in [industry]. I see you specialize in [their focus area]. I'd like to connect in case there's a fit for current or future roles. Happy to share my resume if helpful.

    Reply When a Recruiter Reaches Out Cold on LinkedIn

    Hi [Name], thanks for reaching out. I'm open to hearing more about this. A bit about me: I'm currently [brief current situation, 1 sentence]. I'm looking for [what you want, 1 sentence]. Happy to set up a call. [Suggest 2-3 time slots] work for me, or let me know what works on your end.

    Optimizing Your LinkedIn

    • • Turn on Open to Work (visible to recruiters only, not your current employer)
    • • Use job titles they search for in your headline (not creative titles like "Growth Wizard")
    • • Fill out your skills section (recruiters filter by skills)
    • • Write a profile summary that reads like a pitch, not a biography

    Staying on the Radar

    • • If actively searching: email headhunters weekly with a brief update
    • • If passively open: email every 3-6 months
    • • Always update them if you change jobs, titles, or contact info
    • • Give headhunters referrals and industry tips. They remember people who help them.

    Weekly Check-In Email (Active Job Search)

    Subject: Quick update | [Your Name] Hi [Headhunter Name], Quick update from my end. I'm still actively looking and available for new opportunities. [Optional: 1-2 sentences on anything new. Example: "I completed a certification this month" or "I'm now open to roles in [new location] as well."] Let me know if anything comes across your desk that could be a fit. Happy to chat anytime. Best, [Your Name]

    Quarterly Check-In Email (Passive / Not Searching)

    Subject: Checking in | [Your Name] Hi [Headhunter Name], Hope things are going well. I wanted to touch base and keep you updated. I'm still at [Company] working on [brief 1-sentence update]. Things are going well, but I'm always open to hearing about the right opportunity. [Optional: share something useful. "I heard [Company X] is expanding their [department]. Might be worth a look for your clients."] Let me know if there's anything I can do for you on my end. Best, [Your Name]

    "I Got a New Job" Update Email

    Subject: Update | Started a new role Hi [Headhunter Name], I wanted to let you know I've accepted a new position as [Title] at [Company]. I started [date]. I appreciate your help during my search. I'd like to stay in touch for the future. If I can ever refer strong candidates your way or share industry info, don't hesitate to reach out. Best, [Your Name] [New email / phone if changed] [LinkedIn URL]
    08

    Working with Multiple Headhunters

    You should work with more than one headhunter. But you need to manage it carefully.

    How Many?

    There's no fixed number. The goal is to have 3-5 strong headhunter relationships in your industry. Some will be active (working on a role for you right now), others will be dormant (keeping you in their database for future roles). The more headhunters who know you, the more opportunities you'll hear about.

    The Rules

    • Tell each headhunter you're working with others. You don't need to name them.
    • Never let two headhunters submit you for the same role at the same company. This creates a fee dispute and both headhunters drop you. Before any headhunter submits your resume, ask which company and which role. Check your tracker.
    • Keep your story consistent across all headhunters. Your salary expectations, location preferences, and deal-breakers should be the same no matter who you're talking to. Headhunters talk to each other.
    • If you get an offer through one headhunter, tell the others promptly. Don't ghost them. Close the loop professionally.

    What if two headhunters contact you about the same role?

    Tell the second headhunter you're already in process for that role with another headhunter. Be direct. They'll appreciate the honesty and may have other roles for you. Never try to work both angles on the same position. It always backfires.

    What if you already applied directly?

    Tell the headhunter immediately. If your resume is already in the company's system, the headhunter cannot place you there. Hiding this wastes their time and damages the relationship. Be honest, and ask if they have other roles.

    09

    When a Recruiter or Headhunter Ghosts You

    This is the most common complaint job seekers have, and it's the most frustrating part of the process.

    Why They Go Silent

    • • They don't have a role that fits you right now
    • • The company put the role on hold or filled it internally
    • • They're juggling 30+ candidates and you're not the top priority
    • • They're waiting on the company for feedback
    • • They moved on to a different search
    • • The company gave negative feedback and they don't want to deliver bad news

    What it doesn't mean: It rarely means you did something wrong. Recruiting is a business transaction. If there's no active role for you, there's no financial reason for them to call.

    Recruiter Went Silent: What to Do

    Were you in an active interview process?

    YES → Did they miss a promised callback date?

    YES → PUSH: Call (not email). Signal urgency.

    NO → Follow up by email. Wait 1 week. Still nothing? Follow up once more. Still nothing? Move on.

    NO → Did you only send a resume (no conversation yet)?

    YES → They don't have a role for you. Keep them in your tracker. Try again in 3-6 months.

    NO → Follow up twice (1 week apart). No response? Move on. Keep the door open.

    Push harder if:

    • • You were in an active interview process
    • • They promised a callback date and missed it
    • • You have a time-sensitive situation (another offer)

    In these cases, follow up by phone. A phone call signals urgency.

    Let go if:

    • • You sent your resume and never heard back
    • • You've followed up twice with no response
    • • They were vague about the role from the start

    Never burn the bridge. The same headhunter who ghosts you today might have your dream role in 6 months.

    Follow-Up Email When They Go Silent

    Subject: Following up | [Your Name] Hi [Name], I wanted to follow up on our last conversation about [the role / your search]. I'm still interested and available. If there's any update on your end, I'd love to hear it. If the timing isn't right, no worries at all. I'm happy to stay in touch for future opportunities. Best, [Your Name]

    Second Follow-Up (Slightly Different Angle)

    Subject: Checking in | [Your Name] Hi [Name], I wanted to confirm you received my last note. I'm still available and interested in [the role / opportunities in your area]. I understand things move fast on your end. If the timing has changed, no problem. I'd still like to stay on your radar for future roles. Best, [Your Name]

    The flip side: if a headhunter consistently ghosts you, doesn't communicate, and provides no feedback after interviews, that's a red flag. Find a better one.

    Quick Reference Cheat Sheet

    The 7 Rules

    1. Understand who pays them
    2. Keep their secrets
    3. Be honest about everything
    4. Be consistent, no surprises (headhunters)
    5. Respond fast
    6. Listen to your headhunter's coaching
    7. Communicate everything, especially other interviews

    The 8-Step Headhunter Process

    Company opens role → Headhunter searches database → Headhunter contacts you → Screening calls (2-3) → Reference checks → Presented to hiring manager → Company interviews you → Hire or pass

    Resume Priority Order

    Referrals → Headhunter submissions → Local candidates → No visa needed → Visa + relocation

    How Often to Stay in Touch

    • • Active job search: weekly email
    • • Passive / not searching: every 3-6 months
    • • Any change in job, title, or contact info: immediately

    What to Have Ready When They Call

    • • Your resume (updated)
    • • Your salary range
    • • Your location preferences and deal-breakers
    • • Your "why are you looking?" answer (clear, 2-3 sentences)
    • • Questions about the role and company

    More Free Guides

    The Perfect Resume: 10 Golden Rules

    Build a resume that lands interviews.

    The Screening Playbook

    How to pass the first call and move to the interview.

    The Pivot Method

    A recruiter's guide to changing careers.

    Found this guide helpful? Share it with a friend